Another Quzqo Portrait

Tue Jul 26, 2005

Done by myself of Himself, using Prismacolor pencils with a little gold leaf thrown in.

Big Horseshow Weekend

Sun Jul 24, 2005

Well, I guess I can say he IS improving...slowly and surely!

GOOD horse show Saturday, they had a monster turnout at the barn, I've no clue how many horses, but the pasture near the outdoor arena was jammed with rigs and trailers and campers, every stall in the barn was occupied, even all the temporary ones. The place was awash in groomed and nice-smelling horsies!

I had Quzqo groomed to the nines, right down to the horse face make-up and hair mousse on his mane, forelock and tailhead (to keep those flyaway hairs under control)((I called it "Coos Mousse"). Ready for his Halter class!

Was some drama before the halter though, turns out the judges were certified assholes, and had the entrants pissed off halfway through the first Showmanship class! There was a male judge and a female judge...the man had a MAJOR attitude...he seemed to have forgotten that the entrants were paying HIS salary, not the other way around. He'd posted these amazingly complex showmanship patterns (you needed a good education in mathematics to get all those pivots he required). Mind, the kids (and adults) around here are used to straightforward, to the point showmanship: walk horse halfway to judge, perform some sort of pivot, back three steps, set up, inspection, then trot off to the line up. This guy (and the woman) had some convoluted choreography that involved 270 degree pivots, zig-zags, backing here, pivoting there...the first four entrants totally screwed it up, so he put his foot down and explained concisely to the remaining entrants EXACTLY what he was looking for, which turned out to be DIFFERENT than his posted pattern!...and then wouldn't allow the first four a re-do, and of course they either didn't place or placed low. UNfortunately for the judge, one of those screwed-over entrants was my farrier's daughter, LOL! My farrier was just a tiny bit bigger than the male judge (and he was no lightweight himself!) had a little conversation with the judge, but the judge wouldn't back down, and those four kids were SOL.

By 9 a.m. the judge already had a reputation that traveled through the show of being mean, rude, brusque, intolerant, and soon got the name of "The Show Nazi" (No Ribbons for YOU!). One young girl I talked to by the Showmanship patterns was absolutely TERRIFIED of the prospect of doing her ridden class, she was sure he was going to drag her off her horse and punch her out if she screwed up! I'd add a "lol" here except it didn't seem that far from the truth!

I wasn't worried, I was carrying my whip, I could blind him if he tried anything, LOL! Turns out there were two of us for "Pleasure Type Geldings", and the fellow was very pleasant to me at the in-gate, and admonished me to "show that Arabian in the free-spirited trot that is his nature"...er...okay...I thought we did quite well, Quzqo set up for me SO nice, and was obsessed with my whip handle so he stretched and pricked his ears and stood so nice...the woman judged asked me how old he was, and turns out she is "into" Egyptian Arabians...course I thought I had the class sussed, because the other entry was that Paint/Shire cross (the one that almost crushed us earlier in the week). ..but, I guess "Touche'" was the better specimen, because he took first, Quzqo 2nd under both judges. GRRRGH. I was a little torqued off, considering my horse was clean enough to eat off of, his hooves were gleaming, his whiskers trimmed, he smelled of fragrant horse makeup and hair mousse, and was the prettiest horse in the WORLD! No, they liked Touche' better, even though he had manure stains on his knees, they hadn't trimmed anything on him, with big whiskers hanging off his face and big hairy ears.

The Champ and Reserve went to ponies, so at least I have that consolation...although in the showback, the lady judge asked me how old my "mare" was! LOL! Good memory, that one.

Guess my horse sucks...here I thought he was a nice example, but guess I'm wrong...should have shown him as a mare!

The lady judge made one of the little girls with a pony cry, because she told her she wasn't allowed to show her pony in a snaffle bridle with a bright purple ribbon browband...the girl was VERY upset, because she was wearing a matching helmet, and it WAS cute...sheesh, cut her some slack, woman!

On to the ridden classes...the judges didn't WANT to wait 45 minutes for lunch, so by the time I got Quzqo tacked up, and myself changed into my show clothes (no, I don't wear breeches in halter!), they were clearing the arena of the lunchtime warmup riders! I had NO warmup time! No practice time, nothing! Oh, I had about 45 minutes to cool my heels while the other Equitation classes went on (the Show Nazi was pissed that he couldn't force the Novices to perform a pattern with cantering...his idea of a Novice was different than the show association's), so I had to try to warm up Quzqo in the field...he was VERY, er, um, "enthusiastic", and totally ignoring me, he wanted to go to his pasture! We ended up doing small bending circles near the arena, got him supple if nothing else (and it was nothing else)

Novice Huntseat Equitation, 19/over, 4 entrants. Quzqo was...well...Quzqo . We just did rail work, no pattern at all (goody!), Quzqo was more high-headed than I'd EVER seen him...but other than that I thought he did well...he trotted nice and forward, slowed to a walk, wouldn't back for love nor money, turned around nice, trotted nice and forward with his nose in the air, slowed to a walk, and didn't veer towards the gate. While we were waiting to exit, the woman judge came up to me, put her hand on my knee, and told me "This isn't Dressage; this isn't Saddleseat. That whip is much too long. I didn't count it against you, but either use a crop or nothing at all". I thanked her for her input, and slashed her across the face, she clutched her eyes that spurt blood like crushed tomatoes...er, wait, no...I thanked her and rode out of the ring (LOL). Well, that's a first..yes, I ride with a Dressage whip, but I don't USE it, I just have to carry it so Himself behaves! There was only one class between then and my next class, no time to go to the barn, so I just dropped the whip by a fence and figured well, I'll ride without it, he's moving nicely when other horses move, so...I might not need it.

We placed 4th out of 4 under both judges for Equitation...LOL. I'd hate to think what we'd have done if she DID penalize me for the whip...

Next class was "Novice Step-up Class", which is Open to all ages, and involves cantering. Yeah, I was a little nervous, but the On Deck area filled with equally nervous Novices (of which I was the oldest!)...my Lord, the barn owner's 4 yr old granddaughter was in my class! LOL, pathetic...but I noticed with some smugness the other three adult ladies who were in my Novice walk/trot Equitation didn't have the nerve to do the "Step Up"! Harrumph! I just hoped we didn't kill any children!

First direction, Quzqo did...um...okay...other than the SUDDEN VEERING AWAY TOWARDS THE OUT GATE! The little shit, every time we got to the corner the furthest from the gate, he'd try to VEER away, cutting corners, cutting across the arena...he ignored my legs, ignored my heels, ignored the spurs (round ball spurs, lest you think I'm abusing the lad). BUT, when they called for the canter, he just oozed into a VERY sweet, balanced (albeit fast compared to the 7 Quarter Horses in the arena with us) canter! I was proud of him...no running off, grabbing the bit, going ape! He still wouldn't back, but I think I got the 5 required steps out of him (took a while). The other direction went okay until they called for the canter, he started out nice until we got to the stretch of fence directly opposite the out gate...the little shit VEERED suddenly to the right and ran RIGHT across the arena, we missed the man judge by a few feet (flashback to Tezlu's showing days), and a well-placed kick got Quzqo back on the rail...GRR...I know what we need to work on!

No lecture from the judge, and I'm HAPPY to say that Quzqo placed 5th out of 8 under one of the judges, and no placing from the other. I'm ASSUMING the Arabian-loving lady judge gave us the placing...the one we DIDN'Tt almost trample to death!

Last class of our day was Novice Huntseat Pleasure, 19/over...walk/trot, heh heh. Quzqo did better...I had dumped my dressage whip and found my shorter riding crop with no lash...guess the lady judge liked THAT better...and maybe she noticed that Quzqo , er, um, behaved a bit better when I did ride with a whip...nice forward motion, no veering, no nonsense, and he even
backed a tiny bit better! We got a 4th and a 2nd!!! (out of 4) WhooHoo!! I'm keepin' that 2nd place!

Today was another day, with lovely severe thunderstorms in the early morning hours that flooded the arena! Believe me, after yesterday's DUST, the mud was welcome! They held the morning classes in the indoor arena (Showmanship, Halter, Lead Line), give the outdoor arena time to drain and de-liquify a bit. The bad weather scared off a lot of entrants, so, Quzqo WON his halter class...of course he was the only entrant, *sigh*. We got our clock cleaned in the Showback, beaten by an OUTSTANDING pony stud...he was small, so he might have been a Shetland (what do I know)...phew...no contest there. BUT, Quzqo now has a(nother) Reserve Championship rosette!! If only the show staff hadn't forgotten and LEFT THE RIBBONS OUTSIDE ALL NIGHT IN THE RAIN! LOL, yes, soaked through, I hung it on his stall and the center fell out! No, no replacements (technically I should have gotten TWO rosettes, since it was a double-judged show, but more on the ribbon shortage later)

At least this time I had time to get him tacked up (because I didn't change into riding togs, I rode in my black jeans and already had my shirt and coat on) and into the arena with the rest of the riders. He started out high-headed and horrible, but as we rode, working on transitions which REALLY helped him focus and settle down (trot five steps, walk five, trot eight, walk three, stop, back, canter 5, trot ten, etc, etc, keep 'em guessing)...that, and the soft wet dirt sucked his energy right out of him, LOL! After half an hour he was slow, calm, rounded, and kept stopping on his own. I was wearing my own personal sauna, GAAAH! Humidity had to be around
99.9999%, thank goodness for the cloud cover.

Different judges today, I got no lectures, but I used my shorter crop just in case. In the Equitation Quzqo did VERY well (I thought), but I guess *I* suck, because again we got 4th out of 4 entries. :-P----

For the Step-up class, I think I counted 12 entrants this time (Bob's 4 yr old granddaughter again, but none of the women from the Novice 19/over class, wimps!). Quzqo did VERY well the first direction, his canter has SO improved (considering 1 yr ago he couldn't canter with a rider at all!). We had to keep dodging around the slow-assed QHs clogging our way with their huge rumps...I swear, the whole landscape was a rolling sea of big brown butt cheeks!! As luck would have it, they called for the walk from the canter JUST as we were approaching the Out gate, so I had Noooo problem slowing Quzqo down, LOL (probably not a good thing to encourage). The other direction went well until they called for the canter...despite his faults, Quzqo is SO good about picking up his correct leads...I saw plenty of highly-trained showhorses taking wrong leads during the day (probably too highly-trained!).

We were cantering so nice, and up ahead was Bob's granddaughter on her big wide-load chestnut QH...I shifted Quzqo a little to the right...and he VEERS off across the damned arena again, heading for the OUTGATE! Again the judges had to jump out of the way (why do they keep
standing there? Stand in the middle or something!), and I got him back on the rail...we came around again, and there's ANOTHER damned QH in our way...I try to move to the inside and Quzqo VEERS off to the right heading for the out gate! Thankfully they called for a walk and the end of the class right then. Hm. We need to work on that.

No placing under Judge "A", but 6th place from Judge "B"!!!!! Out of 12, that ain't bad!!!

Finally, the last class of the show for us, the Huntseat Pleasure, Novice 19/0ver. Same ladies from earlier. We did all right I think...screwed up the Back-5-Steps, but what else is new. Quzqo had a lovely floating ground-eating trot (but not fast or out of control), his head was lower (not
low, not sky-high either), I got my diagonals right...after the class the judges had us line up, which was something new...and one by one they talked to each of us...the first woman, whose big-assed QH was nearly black with sweat, they admonished to give the horse a rest, don't work him so hard, he shouldn't be that soaked with sweat from head to toe...the woman blathered
about how hot it is (er, it's cloudy, in the low 80's, not that bad). The next lady received general complements...me, they asked if I did a lot of Endurance Riding! BWAHAHAHAAAA! No, I explained this was Quzqo's 4th show (actually it's his 5th real show, but I forgot), and that he's a
rescue...they were impressed and repeatedly told me to keep up the good work, and they hoped to see him do even better next year! (aw, gawrsh! guess they don't mind getting run over occasionally). The woman on my right was on a big-assed Paint horse, and although the judges spoke quietly, from what I gathered they saw the horse was limping throughout the whole class, and that they would have given her first and 2nd place except that she rode an obviously lame horse, which they thought was cruelty...the woman said she was riding the horse in the field and felt him step on something like a rock and he probably has a stone bruise, and she didn't think it would matter...after all, she's a Dressage rider...(???)...well, the judges didn't buy it, and basically disqualified her!

Which meant Quzqo and I got 3rd out of 3 from both judges!

Heh heh...when I was leading Quzqo back to the barn, I saw the Dressage Queen SOBBING to her friend how she'd been disqualified! Give me a break! This woman was an adult, not some 19 yr old! Ha, and I call my horse a Drama Queen!

That's it for this weekend. Since the showholders apparently forgot to ORDER RIBBONS, they had a severe rosette shortage...since they didn't have dates printed on the ribbons, they were using leftovers from last year, but by mid-afternoon yesterday they'd run out of Blues (except some they'd hoarded away for today's leadline class). Instead they incorporated a system where
you'd get a square of cardboard...blue, red, yellow, white, BLACK (they couldn't find pink), green. Each placing then had a monetary value, and could be redeemed at "Bob's Tack Store", which they had set up near the show ring. They had everything from mane combs ($1) to Western neoprene cinches ($18)...kind of a neat idea, although at first I wasn't keen on the idea.
I'm a novice, I WANT pretty ribbons to hang on my tack cupboard door, dammit! But by this afternoon, I had a big fistful of, well, last place ribbons, nothing to be real proud of, and since I had two blue pieces of cardboard from today's halter class...I ended up with $11.50 worth of credit (I'm keeping the rosettes that were actual achievements, i.e. I beat someone else to get them, LOL)..bought a lovely PURPLE feed bucket and a red lead rope...what the hey.

How To Kill Your Horse

Fri Jul 22, 2005

Had a semi-lovely afternoon at the barn, fussing over Quzqo, making him the Ultimate Purdy Boy for the horse show at the barn tomorrow...he was pretty obnoxious, fussing and wiggling and pawing and intent on goobering up the back of my head (that's a strange sensation, a sloppy moist horse muzzle pressing down on your head as you're bent over trimming fetlocks) (think I'd better take a shower and wash my hair tonight)

While I was fussing over Himself, one of the boarders was saddling up her horse across the arena...he's a huge ex-racehorse named "Tab" for short. They arrived at the barn last fall, and she'd been working with the barn's trainer, taking riding lessons, and having the trainer work on with the horse. The woman has always been a...well.....abrasive bitch. I remember the first time I saw her, she came STORMING into the barn cussing a blue streak because the barn workers had put her horse out in the pasture! And her mousy husband trailing behind her ten feet behind (a safe distance?), not saying a word. Oh, poor thing, she had to walk out to the pasture and get her horse! Those "goddamned assholes" put him outside!

That horse spent the entire winter in his stall, coming out only when she showed up to ride him. When spring and summer came, she allowed "Tab" to go out, but ONLY at night, he still had to spend the days inside. I remember one lesson with the trainer, when Deb, the trainer, was riding the horse, he was nice and rounded, nice energetic trot, did what he was asked. When his owner rode him, his back was hollowed, his head was up, and she was sawing on the reins like she was rowing a boat. I believe the horse bucked her off shortly after, LOL, but she got back on and tormented the beast the rest of the evening.

Well, as I mentioned, she was saddling up Tab, I didn't pay her much notice, I was too busy searching for stray whiskers on Quzqo's nostrils (love those purple plastic nose shavers!!)...a few minutes passed, suddently Tab and his rider came GALLOPING into the barn FLYING down the length of the indoor arena and nearly slamming into the far wall! Scared the shit out of Quzqo, I'm lucky my feet were far enough away or he would have stomped me for sure! She spun around and trotted Tab back outside...I couldn't figure WHAT she was doing...if she wanted to practice galloping, the entire outdoor arena was free, and it's a lot bigger than the indoor, and not filled with tractors, sawdust trailers, and temporary stalls (for the horse show). A few minutes later they came back, GALLOPING FULL BORE down the length of the arena...turned around (I couldn't see because of the temporary stalls), and trotted back out. I was getting pretty annoyed...what an obnoxious bitch!

She came back into the barn, dismounted, and led Tab over to the counter by the door where the phone is...about 10 feet from where I had Quzqo tied...Tab was fussing and wiggling and dancing and pawing, he swung his rear around, I quickly untied Quzqo and backed him away, just missing being smacked by a huge TB ass. She smacked him in the shoulder and told him to
"focus"...gave up on trying to make a call, and led the horse back into the arena, and I assume untacked him...about 10 minutes later she was stomping around the arena, dragging Tab behind her...

I went outside to give Quzqo a sponge bath /touch-up with the whitening shampoo...he'd graze while I scrubbed those stubborn spots (O, I miss my brown horse!!)(but wouldn't trade Quzqo for one!)...came back in, was doing something else, I heard people talking, something about "colic" and "did anybody call the owner?" and "she's here"...they were trying to contact the vet, but couldn't for some reason (I think it was long distance and the kid doing the dialing didn't know about dialing a "1" first)...eventually here came Tab and his owner, dragging him along...oh, shit...Tab is colicing???

My friend with the Paint mare was there by then, and she confirmed it...you could see just the way he was moving....his stomach was tucked up, back hollowed, head up, moving stiffly...the woman started TROTTING him around...both my friend and I were kind of incredulous at THAT...I've dealt with enough colicy Arabians where I used to board and we NEVER trotted them, only walked them (and walked them and walked them and walked them), gave them a shot of Banamine, walk 'em til you get a fart and a poop. But the owner (I don't know her name, had no wish to learn it) was dragging that horse at a FAST walk, then a TROT, then a fast walk, then trotting...eventually one of the barn boys was following them with a rod with a rag tied at the end, shooing the horse along, keeping him moving. I had to take Quzqo back outside for more touch ups, when we came back inside, Tab was down...five people were yelling at him, hitting him, whipping him, dragging on his face...eventually they DID get him up, and were back
dragging him, hitting him on the butt with the rod...more than once his hindquarters started to buckle but they yanked and beat at him to keep him moving.

Had to take Quzqo outside to get his hooves dry so we could shave his pasterns, took him out back and walked past Tab's trailer...they had custom lettering on the front, "The Tabulator...Ex-Racehorse"...bitterly I thought they might have to change that to "The Tabulator, Ex-horse".

By the time we got back, that poor horse was soaking wet from nose to tail in sweat..."He's not used to the heat!" I heard the bitch owner say...(it'd been in the upper 70's today)...they never did get ahold of the regular barn vet, but luckily were able to get ahold of another vet whose office was just a few miles from the barn. By the time she showed up, Tab had fallen down again, and there was nothing they could do to get him up. The vet checked what she could, and conferred with the owner, who was crying by now (probably angry she'll have to change the lettering on her horse trailer)...I took Quzqo back outside (just couldn't get those brown spots to
clean up!) for more sponge-bath, but we were right outside the barn door, and I saw them shepherding the owner away...oh, shit.

After 5 minutes or so, I brought Quzqo back in, and they had put Tab down. They brought around the tractor with the bucket on the front, and Bob, the barn owner, told the guy which pasture he was to dig the hole in, and that Bob would bring the horse out. Call me hardened, heartless, cold, whatever, but it was interesting to watch. Never occured to me that they'd use the forklift on the barn tractor...made sense. God knows I've seen enough dead horses in my day, including my own, so it didn't bother me at all...Sandy, my friend, had taken her Paint to the back barn to finish banding her mane, she couldn't watch. Believe me, that dead horse was in lot better shape than he'd been 15 minutes early, writhing and rolling and kicking in AGONY because he had a stupid BITCH for an owner!

That's another thing...I don't feel the least bit sorry for that woman. Couldn't happen to a more deserving person. That horse had dropped around 200# over the Summer, she kept it in a stall (why? because it was getting fat with the free-choice hay or grazing?), she hit him, she yelled at
him...I think that horse is happier now.

I know Bob was rushing to get the dead horse out of his indoor arena, because people were arriving for the horse show tomorrow...can't look too good, having a dead horse blocking the temporary stalls...two women had to wait outside with their horses because Tab was blocking their assigned stalls.

Still kind of hard to believe...how a horse can go from galloping down an arena to dead in 2 hours. Makes you wonder. Makes ME wonder anyway.

And yes, I wish to HELL I had had the guts to speak up when they were trotting him around, but had to admit, that woman intimidated ME as well. Toss another thing into my pile of Life's Regrets.

But on a BRIGHTER note...yesterday morning one of the boarders' mare gave birth to an ADORABLE little filly! And the circle of life continues...albeit a bit backwards in this case.

"One child born to carry on, carry on..."

Quzqo's Perfect Show Record

Thu Jul 21, 2005

We went to the fun show at the fairgrounds last night, and Quzqo was his usual nigh-perfect Self! I'll give him this much, he's getting much better and more mellow about trailering...he only put on ONE Drama Queen "No, I don't THINK so" about getting into the trailer, but I just backed him up a few feet, then we tried again, and he stepped up and in (as opposed to LEAPING like a show jumper). At the fairgrounds he stepped out, instead of LEAPING like a show jumper. He even behaved himself at the fairgrounds. He's been there twice before, so I think he knows where he is, and isn't worried any longer...back in May he was wiggling all over, whinneying, pawing, being an idjit.

Got a wonderful surprise, mainly seeing an old friend from the barn where I used to board, gosh, I haven't seen her in 7 years or so! What's worse, her cute little daughter who used to ride in the kiddie classes atop their big QH mare is now **20**, and would be riding against ME in the "over 19" class! AAAGH! With the same laid-back QH who always did great at the shows, *sigh*. She (the horse) was Tezlu's girlfriend and she used to beat him at shows back then! LOL, we used to compete against each other in the NOVICE walk/trot classes in 1990!

Was a pretty crowded show, I think the largest class was 19 for the Novice Western Pleasure! They had 11 entries for the Lead Line...amazing! (and too cute for words!) I only took Quzqo into the Huntseat Pleasure, which had 9 in it. He did....okay. He was better about going into the ring (back in May he pitched a Fit at the in-gate, not wanting to go in), lovely trot, lovely transitions, didn't spook at the row of dumpsters at one end of the arena, picked up his correct leads...and proceeded to BOMB AROUND THE ARENA LIKE A CRAZY MAN!! LOL! Tried my darnedest to calm him down...relaxing my seat, sitting upright, cooing to him to be "eaaaaasy... eeeaaaasyyy", but didn't do much good...I was sort of in a dilemma, because I knew if I tried to collect him up with the reins, he'd slow down to a trot, I had to urge him with a spur a couple of times in the corners, but at least he made it all the way around the arena 3 times without breaking his gait or veering for the gate..which was GOOD because some damned kids had opened the OUT gate and left it open, we had a four-foot opening...but he was cantering on his right lead by that time, and the gate was to our left...or he might have veered for it (he did that to me in the warm-up ring later, but we were trotting). We cut off a Pro Trainer on a QH, I hope she heard my "Sorry!", LOL.

He slowed to a walk real nice when asked, turned like a pro, walked nice, picked up his right lead VERY nicely...and proceeded to BOMB AROUND THE ARENA LIKE A CRAZY MAN! Well, at least he can do it in both directions, LOL! However, halfway through the cantering phase I felt him round and actually relax and slow...and we got a few strides of a very nice civilized cantering (for an Arabian in a snaffle bit). Trot, line up, back...which he DID...for Quzqo, backing is an issue, but I'm happy he gave me the two steps he did...when I got him, he wouldn't even back from the ground, never mind with a rider!

Course we didn't place, thus his perfect show record of non-placing! I guess I should figure ANY improvement from a previous effort is a Blue Ribbon, and I have to remember this was his FOURTH 'big horse' class in his life, so...not so bad.

The horses from the Arabian Show Barn (where I used to board) were there...all the Class A National Champions...damn, they were BEAUTIFUL, *sigh*. Sleek, elegant, arched necks, silky manes, glossy...prancing and mincing and being so perfect...had to remind myself that they're also into their teens in age, been trained to the gills and beyond, and the English ones were wearing Kimberwickes, and the Western ones had curb bits the size of pipe wrenches. I'd mince and prance delicately if I had more hardware than Ace in my mouth too!

We got back to the barn around 10...today I hope to just go on a nice, no-nonsense trail ride in the State Forest...try out my new endurance saddle (need to drill some holes first!). Won't give a crap what his headset is, or what lead he takes, or on which diagonal I post!

Quzqo T. Naughtyhorse

Tue Jul 19, 2005

Okay, you Moms with sulky teenage boys, can you give me some advice here? I swear, last night Quzqo transformed into a pouty, sulky, petulant human teenager! Why? Because Mean Mom wouldn't let him eat hay in his stall and took him to the yucky boring dumb arena and was trying to make him do stuff!

He got to enjoy his evening grain, was adorable while being brushed, feasted on carrot chunks and got clicker-trained, but once the saddle was on him and we started for the door, he started drrrraaaaagggging along behind me like a dead weight, dawdling and procrastinating, stopping to sniff the ground, trying to get at the round bales, stopping to look at "something" far away, dragging his feet...I would have had better luck dragging one of those round bales down to the
arena!

Got on him without an argument (for once), had his draw reins on, he dropped his nose to the arena dirt, and would NOT raise it! He wouldn't walk, he wouldn't trot, he kept dropping his head right down to the dirt...nothing there, just sand...no amount of heels or spurs got him to move, a pop (to my boot) with the whip got him to shuffle a couple of steps before stopping and dropping his head. I got off and looked in his mouth, maybe the bit got under his tongue...nope, everything was fine! Draaaagged him back to the mounting block, got back on...down went the head, horse wouldn't move. He was POUTING!

Finally I hauled his head UP, popped HIM in the butt with the whip, and got him moving, and managed to get him walking around the arena at least. There were 4 other horses being worked, so it's not like he was alone! I could NOT get him into a trot! He wouldn't even walk faster, just totally ignored me (spurs and all), wouldn't back up, wouldn't turn, kept dropping his head (I wasn't even using the draw reins, they were just "there", I was using the snaffle rein entirely)...got him into a NICE trot along the rail until he decided to VEER to the right to the middle of the ring! He wasn't spooking, he just decided he wanted to go THAT way! Earned himself a multitude of small circles before returning to the rail...he pulled that around 5 times at various spots in the arena, at the trot AND canter! Little bastard, LOL!

Eventually I gave up, and we went on a trail ride around the perimeter of the farm, and he was fine, a bit draggy, but more enthused about THAT. What a nut!

Bad news for him...Tomorrow night is the fun show at the Fairgrounds, which means he gets to PRACTICE tonight, and no excuses this time! 'tis a sad testimony if he thinks he can get himself labeled "ring sour" after maybe 2 hours' total ring work in a two week period, LOL!

Shall I send him to his room and take away his X-box?

You Can't Roller Skate in a Buffalo Herd

Sun Jul 10, 2005

And you can't show an Arabian at a Paint Horse Show!

Yep, what I THOUGHT was going to be that cool Arabian/Morgan Assn. show this weekend, turned out to be a Memorial Horse Show to benefit Cancer Research put on by a PAINT HORSE ranch!

Fish, meet desert!

LOL, I'm laughing about it NOW...30 hours ago I was near tears regretting the whole caper!!

Started out pretty good, at 6 A.friggin' M. in the morning! I think around 12 horses from the barn ended up going, happily Quzqo loaded like a champ into the 2-horse slant load stock trailer, and rode like a champ the hour drive downstate. That's where his Championship performance ended. Oh, everything went okay, considering...nice small town fairgrounds right in the middle of town, we parked inside the fence about 30 feet from a busy 5-lane highway, but Quzqo didn't mind one bit (except early evening when somebody's car backfired, that horse shot straight up in the air, as far as his tied lead would let him, LOL...he bounced around on the end of it like a balloon on a string until I got him calmed back down to Earth!). He'd even peed in the trailer, so when I opened the door, I was greeted by Lake Quzqo with a big island of shit in the middle! What a good boy! (Had to do something to occupy himself I guess)

Was surprised to see an aquaintance there, and found out later he was showing an adorable dark dark bay yearling filly (what's he got, ASBs? She had that look) About as big a fish out of water as Quzqo, considering the woman the show was memorializing was big into Paint horses, and 80% of the equine flesh in attendance were Paints! 18% were QHs, I saw one App, Three Arabians, two Morgans, a BLM Mustang, one Mini horse, & the ASB. Oh yes, and one TB (retired race horse from our barn). Everything else was Overo, Tovero, Tobiano, Sabino, Minimal Overo, Splash, WHEW! If you were into pinto coloration, you'd have loved that show!!

Well, despite his having spent the night in a sheet, Quzqo still managed to WALLOW and GRIND in great gobs of green manure ALL over himself, both sides, AND his face... I knew he was tired the previous night, but c'mon! Thankfully my trailering companion with an overo Paint mare, had some blue shampoo, so poor Quzqo got another bath on the fairgrounds. It was 75 degrees by 9 a.m., he had NO problems drying off in time for his first class, which was the Halter Jackpot. Since it was also double-judged, I had to pay double-fee to enter! $20, but I was SO confident in my good-lookin' boy. (he WAS gleaming, even his pasterns were shimmy silver in the sunlight, his crest and dock moussed so not one stray hair showed, clipped and buffed and polished and sweet-smelling and SO dapper in his new show halter...Phew!) There were 7 entries in the class...1 Arabian and 6 PAINTS (duuuuh). I'd been clicker-training him for weeks to get him to "target" to the handle of my whip, and he's gotten so good he didn't even need the apple hidden in my hand, or the clicker...I got him set up, and raised the whip, and he just snaked his head right out, ears pricked, up high and arched and held it and held it and held it, even cocking it slightly...I was SO proud of him...I hoped the judge noticed that the lead was totally slack (but not sloppy), demonstrating what a good, obedient horse he was, stretching everything he owned to flatten that topline and just ooze grace and beauty....

Yeah, we got nuttin'. But, they only placed to third (cash prizes), so that means the other 3 Paints got nuttin' as well. But I was proud he did so well, even though I'd pissed away $20 in the process (I reminded myself, "it's for a good cause...cancer esearch!")

Had about 45 minutes 'til his REAL Halter Class..."Pleasure Type Geldings" (no, no "Most Classic Arabian" class, *sigh*, though they did have a "Color Class" for the PAINTS!), so I let him enjoy some hay and relax by the trailer...then I discovered on his left buttock, a big long streak of unrinsed blue shampoo! AAAUGH! No, it wasn't blue any more, it'd soaked in, so it was just a long dark grey area, with lots of dust/dirt stuck to it...but it also could have been just part of his coat pattern, if you
weren't familiar with Quzqo's back buttock! Plus his buttock was facing West during the class, which meant when the judge was on that end of him, the sun would have been in his eyes, so I doubt they saw it...needless to say, Quzqo's left buttock got a quick sponge-off!

Watched the Pleasure Type Mare class, a lovely Morgan took the first, don't know what took 2nd because they dismissed the class, and later would announce the placings, using the entrant's name and number, not the horse, so you really had no idea who won what unless you knew the people...hated that method! There was a lovely bay rabicano Arabian mare in that class, but she got 3rd I believe...a Miniature Horse got 4th out of 4 (which had no business being in that class since they also had a Pony Halter class)

My friend's yearling won the Weanling/Yearling class, no surprise there...that was a gorgeous filly...dapples galore!

Finally Pleasure Type Gelding...with a whopping TWO entries...Cusco, and a bay Arabian gelding with, well, a pretty straight head and a big dip in the back and a big round butt (BubbleButt the Race Horse?). No, I'm not just being barn-blind, my old guy, Tezlu, with his skinny chest and rafter hips had better conformation that that thing...just that concave topline would
have kept me from showing it in Halter...he was being shown by a young teenage girl in a Western slinky top (blue with spangles), and neither she nor horse knew what they were doing. So, we trotted into the arena, I got Quzqo set right up, he stretched beautifully, better than before...but started to get fussy and bored, and started cocking his hind leg...I'd get
him set up again, he'd move his front leg..I put it back, he'd decide to look over to the left...and cock a hind leg, I'd get him set right up again, finally he got bored with bugging me and posed VERY nicely for a good long stretch...meanwhile the other girl's horse was all over the place, switching his tail, back hollowed, head up high, legs everywhere...

The judges dismissed us from the arena, to await the placings...didn't have to wait long. Judge "A" placed Quzqo FIRST (out of two, BFD), but Judge "B" placed the bubble-butt first and Quzqo Second! GRRRRGH! The sun must have been in his eyes, or else he likes teenage girls (she wasn't buxom either)...more likely he didn't give a crap about stupid Arabs and felt sorry for the kid so gave her a blue because that other broad probably has big bucks to have such a fancy horse and get-up and knows what she's doing and probably has a spare room full of trophies, so give the kid a blue ribbon, what the hell, who cares, this is a PAINT horse show!

Well, at least we got two rosettes (a rather morbid design I thought, with two black streamers...I know the woman who died was the showholder's sister, but how about something a little more optimistic???), and got to go into the Championship Showback! Which took place a few minutes later... Quzqo did WONDERFUL...he showed his little self like never before, plenty of "Look at MEEEE! I'm PRETTY!"...Ibn Bubble Butt was all over the place like before...unfortunately the Showback also included my friend and his yearling which stretched right out and stood so nice, and another woman with the Morgan from the Mare's class (technically there should have been another mare, but who knows where she went, I didn't care!). Of course, the woman with the Morgan took the Champ, my friend took the Reserve, Quzqo and Ibn Ben Bubble got naught...but when I saw they didn't have proper Championship rosettes for prizes (just handed out a regular Blue for the Champ, Red for the Reserve),
I felt better! Cripes, they couldn't at least get tri-colored rosettes? Or they couldn't figure out how to include the BLACK streamers into them?

Quzqo did good though...Halter is his forte'...fortunately a mere 13 days from now is the two-day double-judged show at the barn, so we can try again! And hopefully they won't have a pair of fat old cowboys judging!

UNfortunately about 10 minutes later they had a 30 minute break for lunch, so the arena instantly filled with riders warming up their horses...I had to change clothes, braid up the horse, tack up the horse...get ON the horse...GAAAH! I made it to the arena with TWO minutes to go before they chased everyone out...at least I got to ride him around half the arena, past the announcer's stand...he was very calm about the whole thing, very ho-hum (he spent half the morning yawning). Our first class was English Equitation 35/over, had quite a wait...tried doing some warm-up circles, bending, flexing, little bit of trotting back and forth, he seemed fine, mellow, not spooky or gawking in the least. My biggest problem was I was TERRIFIED, LOL. Not keen on taking a horse into a strange arena for the first time and having to canter him...why O why didn't I lie and enter him in Novice! The woman we rode down with was smart, she DID sign up for the Novice WP & Western Horsemanship, never mind she's shown Morgans for eons... she figures her horse is a novice (4 yrs old), so that counts. U-huh...

Class finally came, the judge had the entrants enter at a walk and find a place on the rail. Quzqo followed the other horses in and figured it was a trail ride, so when the horse in front of us went way ahead and stopped, I tried to stop him a good distance behind...oh, no, he wanted to follow THAT horse...and started to yank and pull and throw his head around and try to
sneak up to the other horse...I walked him in a tight circle, JUST as we're facing the wrong direction, the announcer goes "TROT!" and the class starts trotting! I quick whisk the horse 180 degrees and get him into a NICE posting trot...we've been working on that long enough, he'd better be good at it by now!!

Doing quite well, we start to pass the other horses...there
were 7 in the class...6 Paints and QHs and one Arabian. They call for a Walk, he slowed right down..."Canter"! Well, it took a little bit of heel but I got him into a pretty, um, er, energetic canter...we passed more horses, cut across the end of the arena, came down the straightaway towards the gates and he STOPS! "Hey, the gates! We're done! Let's go home!"

I get him BACK into a canter, we go maybe 1/4 of the arena and he slows down to a trot and walk...I stop him, and get him into a canter from a standstill...I tell ya, I'm about picking that horse up and carrying him!! We pass more horses, get to the end of the arena, he slows down to a trot, I get him back into the canter, then the announcer calls for a walk! THAT he could do. We reversed okay (big whoop), then the judge called for a sitting trot! ARRRGH...well, it's Equitation, right? They judge the rider, not the horse.... Quzqo has never done a sitting-speed trot in his life...I tried to get him into a slow (for him) trot and by God I SAT that thing!!! We were passing all those middle aged women on their stock horses but I was sitting, dammit!! Mercifully they called for a posting trot and THAT I could do, LOL...couldn't we just trot and walk??? Please? Nope..."Canter"!

Luckily Quzqo's right lead is his better one, and he got into a nice (for him) canter...we still passed the other horses, I know we lapped that one tobiano at least twice during the class, LOL! He got near the gates and slowed to a trot and veered to the left. (to the gate)...I KICKED him with my outside heel and got his butt back into a canter and I held that horse in the gait by sheer will power!! My thighs must be made of iron by now! Then they called for a walk, halt on the rail, back three steps (he did, hoorah!!!) (He didn't know how to back up when I got him, so I'm proud of that), line up. I parked him near the gate so we could slink out quickly.

Needless to say we didn't place, but Judge "A" did give me an "Honorable Mention", BWAHAHA! Thank you, judge, I needed that!

$8 down the crapper...but, "it's for a good cause...cancer research!".

What a contrast to showing my old guy, Tezlu...I couldn't get him to slow down at the canter! We'd usually end up doing a hand gallop long AFTER they called for the next gait. I stopped showing him after we almost ran over a judge, LOL!

So I spent the next hour or so moping and disgusted and disappointed and frustrated, and having to deal with perpetually cheery good sports from the barn who would tell me "It's all in fun, isn't it?" "Have a good time, that's what's important" "At least you're making the effort, that's what counts". SHADDAP! You guys have ribbons! Your horses have remote controls
embedded in the pommel of their saddles, with a button for "canter" and "back up", and are big fat stock horses that my horse can walk faster than they can canter! Your horses cost thousands of dollars and have had more education than I have! I'll admit, my dread was that I've got another unshowable Tezlu on my hands, and I WAS so looking forward to being able to
show him...granted he's good at Halter, and is a wonderful person for a horse, but still...

I figured I'd adopt my Equilocity frame of mind..."I paid my money, dammit, I'll make them LOOK at my horse!!!" I just warned the other ladies to give me lots of room, and I can't be responsible for their safety, LOL! English Pleasure, 35/over, here we come!

The class came, I muttered under my breath "It'll be just like Beggar's Canyon back home..." and into the arena we walked... this time I took him to the left and we found a stop on the rail away from the other horses (no "trail ride" mentality this time!) He started to fuss and twist and suddenly stops...and PEES! Why not! What the hell!! Can't be much worse!! Thus relieved, he started to fuss again, and I was again trying to circle him...AGAIN I was pointing the wrong way when the damned announcer said "Trot". ARRRGH! (Y'know, NORMALLY, when the horses have all entered the ring, the announcer says "This is your class" which lets the rider know that it's about to start...grr). I saw the horse in front of us trotting towards us, I get him turned around and off we go!

Now THIS time I know his tricks, and know about the lure of the out gate, and I'm ready! They called for the canter, I get him right into a nice hand gallop (BWAHHAHA! I don't CARE either!!! Outta my way!!!)...I WAS trying to slow him down, but the new surroundings, all the other cantering horses (8 entries), if I pulled on the reins, he'd throw his head up and speed up, if I tried dropping my weight and leaning back, he'd speed up, if I tried releasing the rein pressure and tensing my tush, he'd speed up...before he'd try to slow down by the gates, and earn a heel to the ribs, and he'd speed up again...we finally got into his "normal" canter, which meant we kept to the inside and passed on the left. They called for a walk...not a problem. Reverse, walk, stop on the rail, back up 3 steps...no problem there! I couldn't breathe, my legs were in agony, and my mouth felt like it was full of cotton, but no problem! "Canter"...Awaaay we go! Yeeahaaa! Outta the way, slowpokes!!! Now for the record, he was doing his normal Quzqo canter, which, I imagine if compared to other Arabians, is pretty normal speed...balanced, ground-covering, animated...able to blow past a cantering Paint horse like it was standing still! "Walk and line up". So we did.

No placing, but at least I had company with one other poor sap this time. But we did it, we did it BETTER (he didn't stop or slow), he picked up the correct lead every time (Even ole Tezlu wouldn't do that!)...so I'll chalk it up to experience...and another $8 down the crapper...("it's for a good cause...cancer research!")

Thank God it was over!! I couldn't WAIT to get OFF that horse (Now I know why the Endurance Riders call that certain condition "Monkey Butt"), get OUT of those clothes, and find some SHADE!!! 3+ hours on horseback in 87 degree sunshine is a bit much! Yes, I tended to Himself as well, he drank two buckets of water and settled down to his hay bag. I got to kill 6 more hours while my companion showed her mare in the Western classes (the NOVICE Western Classes, Grrrr...where she did pretty good, considering it was the mare's first show). The windshield of the truck was well-bedecked in ribbons, and at least the lone BLUE one was Quzqo's!!

Now, ole Tezlu was a pretty self-assured old fellow...you could take him to a show, leave him tied to a trailer with a haynet, and go do something else for hours. You'd come back, find the haynet empty and him standing there with a foot cocked, and that beloved guileless look on his face (He had a big wide white blaze that gave him this innocent dumb look...fooled a LOT of people).

Not so, His Highness Emperor Kuzco.

"Helloooo, Earth to Human. *I* seem to be OUT OF HAY!"

"A-HEM! Why are you over THERE, when *I* am over HERE???"

"This water is warm! I demand fresh, COOL clean water!"

"Pay attention to MEEEEEE!"

If he'd emptied his haybag and scrounged every scrap on the ground, he'd start pawing and digging, if the water was gone, he'd start pawing at the bucket, then look up at me like "WELL????" LOL...Like the obedient slave I am, I'd go get him some more, and at least I got an appreciative nicker...course I had to hold the bucket up for him to take his dainty sips. When the hay ran out, he'd start pawing and jigging around, so I'd take him for a walk around the fairgrounds...he wanted to be involved, that was obvious! Even when he did settle down, he'd face the highway and watch the cars go by, or watch the people at the gas station across the highway, it was pretty neat that he was so "into" everything! Of course, that's probably his first real "away" horse show experience tied to a trailer all day, so who knows (the 2 day show we did last year, we'd rented stalls, so he had a comfy box stall to relax in between classes).

The show FINALLY got over around 8:30 at night! GAAAH! The temperature had plummeted from 90 degrees to a brisk 78, I'd been on my feet for about 14 hours (well, that's counting sitting in the saddle)(but not counting riding in the truck), all I'd had to eat was one hot dog and some potato chips...the horses were crabby and whiny, I was whiny, my companion tripped on her chaps and took a header, LOL (she's fine). Around 8 Quzqo started getting "clingy", and would ooze over to where I was sitting and sort of rest his muzzle on my head or shoulder, LOL! Yep, Arabians ARE "people horses"!

Came loading time and "Sienna" the Paint mare got into the trailer first...I started to lead Quzqo in and he stopped, his nostrils flared, and suddenly Sienna let loose a cannon spray of pee! AAAGH! Jump back!!! LOL! She peed for the first time all day, long and hard, all over the floor of the trailer (I had cleaned it out that morning, so Quzqo's pee had dried up long ago). THEN she took a big stinky dump in the midst of it...and Quzqo would go NO where NEAR the thing! He did NOT want into the trailer, and I can tell you, it was pretty thick in there, LOL!! Coos had a look like "Ewww! Mare Pee!!!"...but, "Make the wrong thing hard, the right thing easy"...he got a little bit of backing up & round&round, then we'd try the trailer again...got his front feet in, he just couldn't make the back ones step that high up, so he hopped out, banging his head on the roof, which almost slipped his halter off his head! No good, that! Round and round and back up back up, try it again, I got into the trailer, tugged the lead, I saw him rock back on his haunches, and the little shit JUMPED into the trailer! LOL! Literally taking flight! What a good boy!!

Got back to the barn around 10:30 p.m....Walking Dead time...even though Himself had scarfed down around 5 flakes of crappy 1st cutting hay during the day, he still wanted two more for dinner...can't imagine where he puts it all!

I didn't return to the show today, though it looks like about everybody else from the barn did...good for them, it got OVER 90 degrees today, LOL...better them than me! I did ride Quzqo (he still likes me, amazing!) this afternoon, in the indoor (shady) arena, and I'd dug out my old draw reins from Tezlu's day, and introduced him to them. It took about a minute, maybe two, for him to understand about draw reins, but once he got the idea that he's supposed to lower his head and tuck his chin to rein pressure, not raise his head sky-high and make faces...I got on him and rode him maybe 20 minutes...I had to use barely ANY pressure to get him to drop his head, and of course, immediately released the pressure when he did...he figured it out
SO quickly it's scary...I'd been avoiding using draw reins because I had some goofy idea of avoiding "abuse" with him, not using anything "artificial", not even a curb bit or kimberwicke, but I think now I realize if they're used as learning tools, they can be a good thing...and he's SO damned smart, who knows, maybe in 13 days, he'll be a different horse!

And thus is our tale told.

More Show Prep

Thu Jul 7, 2005

Well, the people running that horse show this weekend oughta just mail me my first place ribbons and Championship rosettes right now, because they're good as won!!

Tonight was Spa Night for Quzqo...the poor guy's been ridden for the past 5 nights/days straight, he (I) needed a break! So he got hisself clipped he did! I wish the Arabian-hating barn owner was there tonight to see that "flightly Airhead" get his whiskers clipped (Bob has told me he hates all Arabians, except Tezlu...he hasn't updated that statement to include Quzqo...yet, LOL). I had his halter undone and hanging around his neck, and I just stood there, clipping away at his nose and lips and chin and jaw, and he just stood there, head down, ears at half-mast, just...doing nothing! LOL! No, he wasn't sick or drugged, just... Quzqo! Got his ears clipped, not a twitch or anything! Biggest problem when he decided he'd try to EAT the
clippers when I was doing his lips (thank goodness horse drool doesn't short out clippers!). Got his ergots trimmed, touched up his bridle path, and man O man, he looks GOOOO-OOOOD!!!

Put on his fancy brown & gold show halter from the auction this past weekend, and went outside to the arena, and practiced our Halter routine...I found if, when I'm running with him, I hold my hand up high, he lifts his head (and tail!) up high and trots SO nicey-nice!!! Not that low-headed hang-dog Stock horse trot! Yet he comes right down to a walk and stops with
me! Took quite a few tries before he caught on where I wanted his feet, and did let me pick them up and put them in the right places...and thanks to the Clicker Training, I can now get him to raise his head up high and stretttttttch it out towards my whip handle (I got an even better result when I put a piece of apple in the palm of that hand, LOL). And I found I can step back about a yard, and he keeps that pose SO pretty...with his one hind leg stretched out behind him, tail up...Damn! Where's the photographers from Arabian Horse World when you need them!!! He looked SO gorgeous, with the setting sunlight glinting off his silvery fur, and the gold on the halter, phew! Hope I don't start crying during the class, LOL!

So, an easy night for Himself...he better enjoy it, because tomorrow night he gets RIDDEN...last chance practice before Saturday...I've decided we're going to do Huntseat Equitation AND the Huntseat Pleasure classes, LOL! Why not, no sense waking up at 4 in the morning for just two halter classes!

Yes, I'll try to get pix taken, but no guarantees. They will have a professional photographer at the show...Hmmm... Stay Tuned...